6 February 2018

Recently I have had to constantly explain to people that me being focused on my education and the career I want has nothing to do with me being single. And I do not understand why in 2018 I have to explain this which led to this rant.
Relationships are hard enough as it is so can we please refrain from anything that complicates it even further, Thank you very much. That I am independent doesn't mean I don't expect to be swept off my feet by a man. Yes,I am fully capable of taking care of myself and yes, I expect my man to take care of me the same way I will take care of him ,but let me help you understand something, just because i expect my man to care of me, does not take away amything from my independence. Being able to take care of yourself as a woman doesn't mean you don't need a man it just means you are self-sufficient human being and there's nothing wrong with that. We have to stop putting these restrictions on ourselves and giving ourselves these either-or options. In an age where we are telling women to be whoever they want to be and that the world is their oyster. It's only fair that we tell them that being a "goal getter" doesn't mean they don't deserve to be treated like the Queens that they are. Everyone wants to love and be loved back. And being an independent woman doesn't mean you should want that any less or that you don't deserve it.
The mere fact that we are tying a woman's Independence to a man irks me. How about I strive to be self-sufficient because my parents have taken care of me my whole life and now that I'm an adult, I want to do that for myself. How about I want to know the feeling of spending on myself with money I worked my butt off for. How about the sense of accomplishment I want to feel after achieving a goal. Or the many other reasons why women are working hard and striving to make themselves better. There is nothing wrong with not wanting to fold your arms sitting around waiting for someone to hand something to you. And getting those things for yourself does not mean you do not like to be spoilt once in a while. We all like to feel good so why should the independent woman be made to feel guilty for feeling so. After all, being a strong, badass, goal getting woman is about breaking the norms. So go ahead, break those rules! Get your money and get you a loving, caring relationship with a man who believes in romance and treating his woman like a princess. Don't let anyone ever tell you it's not possible or that you don't deserve it.
I honestly don't think we should be ashamed of wanting and needing a man. We are humans and we want to share our lives with others. And the fact that you've mastered the art of being able to get things done by yourself and being comfortable alone (which is very important) does not mean you do not want a partner in love.
And while we are it, there is nothing wrong with wanting to be alone either. If you truly feel like you do not want to be in a relationship, that's your choice and again you shouldn't feel ashamed for it. We have to stop taking this independence thing to the extreme and forcing people to choose what they want to be (alone or hitched) or what type of person they should be with and at what time they should be with such person. We can have it all. And I feel like, well, that should be the point of this whole age of the Independent Woman.
                                                                                                Love, Neera.

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