HOW YOUNG IS TOO YOUNG FOR A SEW-IN? | Maggie Stepherson

18 July 2018


Is this the new back to school hairstyle for children? What happened to beads and bows? Ponytails and candy curls? Braids? Or possibly plats?

What are we teaching our young ladies this early on about self-appreciation and self-love? Are we not beautiful unless we have a head full of long hair? Are we not beautiful without weave?

Today’s society glorifies fair skin, long hair and figure eight frames. It’s as if you don’t have any of these elements than you are not considered beautiful to the majority. This is what our youth is growing up witnessing. I can recall, like it was yesterday, when my 10 year old niece came home crying. I said, “What’s the matter beautiful, why are you crying?” She said, “Titi the girls in class call me bald head and ugly because I don’t have long hair like them.” It hurt me because I knew what she was going through, so I told her “Hair doesn’t make you, YOU make the hair!” She didn’t understand so I had to break it down to her. We as African American women are trend setters all through out the world, the same things we are ridiculed about become the same trends that other races go out and spend thousands of dollars on to imitate. No matter if its our short 4c hair, our full lips, high cheek bones, big butts or corn row braids we set the tempo as to what is trendy and flavorful. Never let the opinion of a small mind dictate the opinion of your beauty. I pulled out a mirror and instructed her to show me where she is bald, because I see hair- she couldn’t. I went on to instruct her, now show me where you see ugly- she couldn’t do that either. Lastly, I instructed her, now show me where you see beautiful white teeth, short curly strands, and beautiful chocolate skin- she smiled and pointed to herself in the mirror.

Growing up I wasn’t allowed to wear any form of extensions. My first experience with weave was when I was 16 years old in high-school and that was in the form of braids. As my parents felt that wearing long extensions; such as the picture posted, makes me look too grown. They felt that appearance would attract the wrong type of attention and ultimately the wrong type of man. I too agree with their opinion because this look on a child is simply too much. Sadly, we live in a day and age where grow men would look at a little girl like this and distort her innocence with his perverted visions. I have been trying to convince myself that maybe this was for a wedding, or a pageant of some sort, but it still makes me uncomfortable to see a child look so grown regardless of the setting that the style is for.
Putting this type of styles on small children is an early form of beauty shaming. Young girls are growing up feeling insecure and inadequate for not looking like the majority. In an effort to embrace our natural beauty I feel that children should be free from enhancements; such as weaves, so that they can build the confidence to know that they are beautiful in the skin their in regardless of the length of their hair and the fairness of their skin. It’s simply a matter of learning to embrace who you are not run away from who you are.

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